Unhappy people are the only people who are going through some bad phases in their life which are bound to happen to everyone at some point in their life.
It can also happen that such people find it hard to deal with those things and become unhappy from that point, and their outlook becomes negative too; you can never change them unless they want to change on their own.
So if you are with such kinds of people, you will often find it difficult to hang out or spend time freely with them.
ways to cope around unhappy people:
Try not to judge or even assume
When you are with unhappy people, you will bound to have some negative effect on yourself. You may feel they are over-reacting, or even they are just doing this to gain sympathy, but at this moment, you should not judge or assume as it leads to a pessimistic mindset.
You need to approach them with empathy and compassion and not judge, as it also instills within you the trait of negativity. You need to make sure that you hear them without making them feel bad regarding it, as they are already having a hard time dealing with it.
Try maintaining a positive space
You should keep in mind that the people you hang out with affect your personality a lot. You should hear their thoughts and help them out in dealing with them with their darkest of times but be aware that you too need to take care of yourself.
You need to maintain a boundary with them so that their thoughts and mindset do not affect you.
You maintain a positive boundary so that you do not fall into that loophole in the course of helping them out. You need to take the required space you need to maintain your sanity and positive approach towards life.
Maintain your emotional response
People who tend to be unhappy often mix in the people who are outrageous or get triggered a lot and can offer them compassion so that they do not feel that they are the only ones who are unhappy.
So to make sure that you do not fall into this trap, make sure that you do not react too much when they ask for your opinions.
If they see that you are paying attention to them, they tend to use it to their advantage where you start to feel the same.
You should maintain your calm and just hear them without letting out your emotions or letting them know about your pattern of behavior, or else they will start influencing you.
Try remembering the levels
When you are around unhappy people, you will notice that they tend to suffer a lot and have higher levels of stress, anxiety, or depression. It is what makes them feel so negative about themselves and also about the life that is leading. You should have a note on their stress levels and so on.
It is because when you are with such negative people, you tend to harp on the minimization of stress levels in your life, and you will feel the urge to stay safe as you already know the threshold levels. It helps you in keeping your mental health in check, too, which is not a bad practice at all.
Put your words into action
When you are around unhappy people, you often wait for the perfect time to motivate them or console them, but this should not be the case as you should not wait for the perfect moment.
You can compliment them for something they did at the present moment or appreciate them for the work that they had been doing.
It boosts their confidence, if not a lot then surely a bit, and it makes them a bit more positive, and you would be the reason for this it might help them believe in themselves and regain back all their confidence.
In short, you are just helping them prove wrong to their thoughts or emotions, which are always hovering around their mind.
Dig deeper into the source but not too much
You will be able to understand the condition and offer them empathy only when you understand the source from when unhappiness became a part of their life.
You will be able to understand the situations that made them this way, but you need to be careful that there will be some instances when they will have no answer to their behavior, and it might upset them.
When you get them upset, they will try to conclude that you are trying to degrade them down as it is natural that they look into the negative sides more.
So make sure that you understand the source that made them unhappy but do not dig too much deep into the hole as it may make them have a negative attitude towards you.
Try removing their negativity, even if it’s just for the moment
You should understand that the unhappiness that has been within them is a result of their imagination and emotions; you cannot change them by just an hour of talking.
You should realize that and not get disgusted or irritated if they do not understand your way of taking them out of this grumpy mood.
Instead, you can listen to their thoughts and imaginations as it makes them feel that someone is out there who would listen to them and it makes them a bit relieved, after listening to them you can show them the positive things in the present moment and how they are working positively in their life. It will make them feel better, even if it is for a moment.
Question yourself at times
You may feel that you are a positive person, so you will not need any sort of checks regarding your issues or mental health, but it is wrong.
Do you need to question yourself at times regarding the whole scenario, like why you are helping those who are unhappy? Is it to be great? To gossip about their thoughts to someone else? Or you feel bad for them genuinely, so you help them.
It makes you realize that you can tell someone the blessings and show them the positivity’s around them, but you can never change the reality of someone. You can help them combat the hard times, and that’s all you can do.
Do not regard something as personal take it as an opportunity to learn
When you are unhappy people, it is possible that they bring out only your darker sides or bring out all the negativities around you.
You need to make sure to understand that you do not take their opinions or judgments as something personal because they are uttered by someone who is not in the right state of mind.
You cannot rule out their visualizations as it makes you learn a lot. You get to see the darker side of things, and it may help you out in realizing that every person has a darker side which includes yourself too. It is just that you need to be careful.
Accept the relationship as it is
You may feel bad due to the suffering that is faced by the unhappy people and feel the need to help them out in every scenario, but it is important to agree on the fact that you can never change someone’s thoughts or behavior by just talking with them unless they want to do it.
You may feel drained out or hopeless when, even after you made them understand, they fall back into the same pit. It may make you question your abilities and which should not be the case.
Rather, you can keep being affectionate and cut them short for yourself so that you are in peace and can accept whatever relationship they have with you.
Avoid focusing on how unhappy they are
They are unhappy either due to their situations or the imaginations that lead them to negative conclusions. You cannot change their reality or control what they think, so you should remember that you should help only to a certain extent.
It is not your lookout to be their therapist for free. When you are with them, do not harp only on the fact that how unhappy they are; it creates a negative mindset too and makes you feel disturbed all the more. It will just mess with your mental peace and make you look only at the negativities.
Try understanding their journey
Unhappy people have their situations and trauma, which impact them a lot, so when you are around them, try to understand their situations and the difficulties they have to go through. You should not deem their journey as something trivial as it impacts them a lot.
You need to understand that something trivial for you might not be the same for them as they tend to look at everything from a pessimistic approach, so it is much worse for them. They have to fight their demons.
Manage your time spent
Human characteristics are based on the type of environment they are in. Your personality traits and your attitude come a lot from the group of people you hang out with, so evidently, you should put a line to the time spent with the unhappy people as it affects your way of thinking and might even start changing your attitude towards life.
You should put a boundary to the amount of time spent with them as too much of anything is not good for you and especially something bad as these people have an innate capability to modify your thinking and thoughts to a large extent.
Take this as a lesson
You should learn from your life in every possible situation or instance. This is the thing that makes you evolve and grow with time. Unknowingly you mature as you get to learn lessons. Similarly, this instance of being around unhappy people will also help you a lot.
It will make you understand how your thoughts control you and how at that moment, everything goes downhill. You will start to be aware of the slightest symptoms of negativity and try to work on it from that time itself so that it cannot harm you.
Try changing the way you view them
You should not look at the unhappy people as the ones who are suffering and be sympathetic towards them. It makes them more conscious regarding their condition, and they, in turn, become more negative.
So it is better that you view them as normal people and empathize and be compassionate towards them when needed.
You can notice that there are even positive things about those people, for example, the way they manage their time, how they convince every client, or any other underrated trait which you might notice.
It will make you feel good and also make you believe that everyone has their good side, but you need to be patient to understand them.
Try being cheerful around them
When you are around such people, you may tend to always sympathize with and listen to their sad stories, but this is futile at times. You can be cheerful and crack hilarious jokes at times to make them laugh, even if it’s for a moment.
You should use your humor to work at this point and make them feel lively enough to enjoy their life though it is temporary.
When you talk about happy things around them, you will feel that they would also have the urge to be happy or do a thing that will make them happy. Although it is not much but you will prove to be a good companion for them.
Take care and focus on yourself too
You are taking care of the ones who find negative even in the way they breathe, so you must keep a check on your mental health and your behavior. You need to focus on your thoughts and emotions and give yourself all the me-time it needs.
You should focus on your health as you are always under the influence of a negative aura it makes you feel unwell. Try to think of the things that make you happy and start doing those. It will shift your mind from a constant topic and help you a lot in rejuvenating you.
Be kind to them
Kindness is something that you have then you will cherish throughout your life. In this cruel world, it makes people believe in humanity all the more.
You should be kind to the people who are unhappy as they have a lot to fight with at the moment, so try to be kind as much as possible to them.
Being kinder to them will make them feel secure, and they will feel that you are a safe place which is a big thing for someone who does not trust themselves own self.
This will, in turn, make them more approachable to you and they may feel relieved after talking with you.
Include them in conversations
You should think of them as someone who should not be included in the gang of normal people as it makes them think that they are untouchables and are not approachable at all. It makes them feel lonely all the more and gives them another reason to be unhappy.
When you are discussing something, try including them in your conversations as they feel included and it gives them a feeling of belonging to a group and to your surprise they might come up with such creative ideas or points which no one in the group has previously noticed.
Unhappy people can be someone who is facing the bad phases of their life or someone who is extremely controlled by their emotions.
So being kind and listening to them should always be your initial step but make sure that you get out of it if ever you feel it is making you feel unsafe or making you pessimistic about your environment or surroundings.
From the above point, you got a clear idea of how to cope when you are around unhappy people without changing your thoughts or making them feel bad.