Life is not always a fun ride but you need to learn to look at the positive side of it. If you constantly surround yourself with negativity, this will do absolutely nothing for your mental peace and you waste precious energy.
Want To Be Happy? – things to stop today
There are a few things you should stop doing right now if you want to be happy in life.
This is the most important thing to do. Never forget about the immense love and affection you have in your life. Don’t forget you have a goal to achieve and many lovely people are always there to support you.
When your life goes through an easy phase, remind yourself how blessed you are and consider yourself more privileged than many other people. This will not only make you feel happy but also teach you to be grateful to other people.
Trying to achieve perfection
Nothing in this world is perfect- everything and everybody is flawed. Accept this and embrace the beauty in your flaws too. When you try too hard to be perfect or you think everything will happen to you like a dream, you end up hurting yourself when things don’t go the way you planned.
Understand that this is normal. Find beauty in the imperfections of life. Put in your best efforts in everything and hope for the best to happen.
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One of our biggest mistakes is to be pessimistic whenever something bad happens to us or things don’t go according to our plan. This will just bring us down and make us feel hopeless and disappointed.
The correct approach to handling a tough situation is to give it a positive meaning if possible and look at it from a fresh perspective. See if you can bring something good out of the problem- and don’t just consider it as your failure.
Do something when you want to do it- not because you are compelled by factors. If you don’t feel like doing it, learn to say ‘no’. Feeling obligated to do something means you are doing it under pressure, and you are not doing it with your heart and dedication.
Thus, the effort has practically no meaning. For example, if you have to go to someone’s wedding and you don’t want to, then stay at home. Do what your heart says.
Spending money unnecessarily
Learn to use your finances smartly. Buy stuff that you need, not what you want. Fix a budget for yourself, and try to follow it closely. Saving money is a very tough task to do, but you gotta try it.
Many people are so much sucked into spending money that they choose to go into debt for their materialistic pleasures. And then, just spend their lives in the burden of that debt. Practice saving money for future happiness and comfort.
Often, in our lives, we come across some people who are constantly frowning about something, and it is impossible to have a normal conversation with them. These are the people who are surrounded by a lot of negativity in their lives.
You need to learn how to smile- always smile. Smiling is the only way to be instantly happy and also spread happiness among others around you. Even if you are upset, try not to let that bring you down.
Loathing your body
All around the world, many people face offensive body shaming but most of us are not capable of appreciating our bodies enough. We look at fashion magazine models and TV actresses, and pine for the kind of beauty they have.
But, what they have is not only outer beauty but also the confidence to look pretty, just the way they are. Love your body- no matter if you are fat or slim. Provide it with all the care it deserves.
Not focusing on self-care
You are probably considered a very caring person by your family and friends, and you are genuinely concerned about everyone’s well-being. But do you put in so much effort in caring about yourself? If not, you are doing it wrong.
You can’t be caring to others if you are unhappy and irritated about yourself. Do everything you need to do to make yourself happy. Only when you are filled with sheer happiness can you think of sharing it with others.
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Being influenced by social conventions and expectations
Being influenced by what society might think of our activities and what others expect from us is a big mistake. If you don’t agree with a social convention, don’t be influenced by it. If you don’t have a lavish house with a pool, or a luxury vintage car.
This doesn’t make you a social outcast and you are still a part of society. Happiness is not something that comes from the numbers in your bank balance. It comes from inside.
Running for more
Our generation believes in the culture that ‘the more, the better. This is a completely misunderstood concept. The real concept to believe in is ‘quality over quantity. It is very important to understand the difference between essentials and luxuries in life.
When you just stick to the things you need, you have a lot more freedom and scope than others who keep running after money and more comfort. Use this space to fill in memories and feelings that matter in life.
Getting caught up in the rat race
There is a difference between doing things that keep you busy and things that are important to you. Have you ever noticed how fast our lives have become? We have no time to spare, no time for ourselves and family and friends.
We are just caught in the fever of competing and running in the rat race for more success, power, and money. This will eventually tire you out and you will also miss the other precious things in life.
It’s a crime. Overthinking every little thing that happens to you or every word a person says to you is very detrimental to your mental health. This is a huge reason why most of us are constantly depressed.
This is because we are too obsessed with being stressed about everything- our jobs, our responsibilities, and our relationships. Stop doing this if you want to be happy. Pause and reflect on what is causing the problem and avoid the negative factors.
Being with toxic people
Most of us spend a lot of our precious time and energy- both physical and mental, on toxic people who are of no good in our lives. When you understand a person has a toxic attitude, immediately start keeping your distance from them.
All these people can give you is negativity and mental harassment. Life is very short to be influenced by such people. Screen your friends carefully and only choose the ones that help you grow and stay positive.
Being too much involved
This happens to us if we don’t know how to love consciously and are not radical while making a decision. Whether it is your job or your relationship, avoid going too deep and being too self-involved.
Be transparent and flexible. Don’t let work take away all your time and keep you constantly busy so that you are left with no time for anything else. The same applies to a relationship too. Keep some borders and give each other enough space.
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Living in an unclean environment
Be it your home or office- make sure you stay in a clean and organized environment. If the space around you is messy or things are kept randomly, this can have a negative impact. So, declutter your stuff once in a while.
Try to develop the habit of cleaning regularly. Get rid of stuff that you are not using. This will give you a fresh and clean place to stay or work in, and will also make you feel better.
Keep this in mind- no two people on this earth are the same, we all are different and have our qualities and virtues. Our brilliance lies in our uniqueness. When you start comparing yourself to others, you’ll just end up feeling miserable about what others have and you don’t.
This evokes jealousy and hatred in our hearts, which is no way to be happy in life. Rather, focus on what you have and work on making changes and developing yourself.
How many times have you been eager to try bungee jumping or participate in a music competition, but couldn’t finally do it because you were too afraid to face the situation? Fear can do that to us.
It has the power to isolate us from all the good things in our lives. You later feel sad because you couldn’t do the thing even if you wanted to so badly. Therefore, never resist your fear and approach the situation with determination.
Depending on others for happiness
If you can’t love yourself and be compassionate, nobody will be able to do that on your behalf. You know what’s best for you and you can act accordingly. Therefore, there’s no point in depending on another person for your happiness.
Also when you do that, you start expecting from other people, and when they can’t live up to it, it depresses you and ruins your relationship with them. Learn to be your decision-maker and decide what makes you happy.
Ignoring your dream
Have you always dreamt of becoming a rock guitarist or a poet? But you have been so engaged at work, that you never had the courage and opportunity to pursue your dream. When you think of it, it brings you down and makes you feel depressed.
Well, stop doing it then. Life demands taking a few risks. Therefore, do whatever it takes to fulfill that dream and work hard with determination and dedication. Who knows how it could work out?
Maybe all of your friends have a relationship but you are still single. When you hear stories or see them together, it heightens your craving for human companionship and love. But always remember, it is never wise to rush into a relationship that you are not ready for yet.
It is much better to be alone rather than going for a miserable relationship where you are not happy. Search for something meaningful and important and wait for a worthy one.
Worrying about the future
You can never plan enough to secure your future. Life is unpredictable, and no matter how thoughtful or wise you are, some things are bound to go wrong. So stop planning for the future that is yet to come and focus on the present.
Look around you and plan on working in the present. For example, when you sit with your morning coffee, don’t think about what you are going to do. Just enjoy your coffee and calm yourself down.
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Neglecting the little things
A big house, an expensive car or designer clothes- stuff that cost you a lot will make you happy. This is a wrong concept. Never neglect the power of little things. Focus on every little detail and try finding happiness in them.
These things can uplift your mood instantly, and you would not have to spend big bucks to buy happiness. Watch your favorite TV show or spend time with your family members- these small things can matter a lot.
Focusing more on what is causing the pain
We all get hurt in the regular course of our lives. It is very natural. But it is not permanent, it passes by at some time. When you constantly focus on the reason you were hurt, it does nothing good to you and just prolongs your sadness and elevates your negative feelings.
Find out the root cause of your pain and identify what or who is hurting you. Eliminate them from your life immediately and focus on getting better gradually.
Complaining about yourself
Whenever you come across a failure or do something wrong, stop whining and thinking that you are good for nothing. There is nothing more stupid than losing confidence in yourself based on an incident or a decision.
Learn to analyze your mistakes, reflect on them, and understand what you’ve been doing wrong. You’ll see that it will eventually lead you to better development and make you a better person who knows how to accept their mistakes and remedy them accordingly.
At some point in life, you do fall apart. There is no shame in accepting that. You can feel depressed, you can have a terrible heartbreak or you can lose a close relative. There is no point in pretending that you are doing well.
This will create a burden in your mind and eventually weigh you down. Speak out once in a while. If you think you need to cry, do it. It’s okay to be vocal about your feelings.
Our fears and restrictions often stand in the way of our happiness and peace of mind. These are a few things that any person should completely avoid doing if they want to have proper mental health. You are the sole person who is responsible for your happiness, and you have to put in the effort to make yourself feel happy.
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“Mindfulness, meditation, and positivity – these three words describe me the best. I founded “BeHappyHuman” blog dedicated to spreading happiness and inner peace through mindfulness and meditation techniques. As a self-taught practitioner, I have been exploring these practices for the past decade and my passion lies in sharing their benefits with others. My mission is to help individuals achieve greater happiness.