When asked what the main goal of life is, most people reply, “To be happy”, but what they don’t realize is that happiness can never be a goal that needs to be achieved. Everyone has their perception and degree of happiness. What makes you happy today might not be of that much value tomorrow.
Reasons why you should never chase happiness:
Try to make every moment happier rather than chasing it
If you think that you could just sit and wait for happiness to approach you by itself, then you are completely wrong. Happiness isn’t something that comes to you on its own, so there is no point in chasing happiness.
You chasing happiness will never result in a fruitful outcome. Instead, try to live your life to the fullest every day and make the most out of every moment so that you can create your moments of happiness rather than running after them.
Happiness can’t be forced
Just like you can’t force someone to do something against their will. Similarly, you can’t force happiness to come to your life and brighten it up suddenly one day. You can’t force a vegetarian to like chicken. In the same way, happiness and well-being can’t be forced as well.
Happiness occurs naturally without you even realizing that it’s going to happen. It is a wonderful feeling which can be enjoyed in its own time only. Like any other emotion, happiness has its own time.
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Other emotions should have their place as well
When you keep on chasing happiness every day, you prohibit your other emotions from shining through. This is now how it works. You should give place to other emotions like anger and sadness as well in your life.
Not every moment is going to be a happy moment, and there’s no such person who experiences happiness only. When you suppress the other emotions, you are pushing back those feelings which will surface one day or the other and make it harder for you.
Try to understand the synonyms of happiness
Happiness comes in many forms like peace, contentment, joy, blessings, and so on. You can achieve happiness via the simplest of things, which you may never notice beforehand until that happens.
When you rephrase happiness, you give more clarity to your life with which you can more positive emotions. Chasing happiness is futile. A simple, peaceful environment can give you utter pleasure, but you can never chase after one. So, stop chasing happiness and look for what brings you joy and contentment.
Start being more decisive
Rather than chasing happiness and waiting for it to come and sit on your lap, decide what it is that you need at that particular moment to be happy. Is it a cup of coffee, or a good book to read, or a time out with your loved ones?
When you decide what you need and do everything to make sure you get it, happiness will arrive automatically. Decide what is it you need to do and how you are going to do it.
Don’t link accomplishments or failures to emotions
It is very important to learn how not to link your happiness with your accomplishments and achievements or your failures and setbacks with sorrow. In this way, you are equating your emotions to materialistic things.
When you do so, you are very likely to get manipulated by your actions. You should not allow the situation to choose your emotions; it should be you who decides what makes you happy or sad. When you fail, you pick yourself up, which can make you happier.
Don’t confine yourself in a box
Wiggle out of that box which defines what makes you happy, rather than which defines who you are as a person. Move out of your comfort zones, be creative with things that you have never done before, or have been afraid to try. You never know what life has in store for you.
Let the light flourish! Think outside the box. Try to figure out inventive ways to make yourself happy. Don’t let anyone define mainstream happiness and prevent you from being unique.
Get rid of what stands as an obstacle between you and happiness
Probably the best way to prohibit yourself from chasing happiness is by getting rid of everything, which stands as an obstacle between you and happiness and forces you to run after it. Get rid of all those toxic influences which grasp you and prevent you from being genuinely happy.
Fill your life with people and experiences which make you realize the true meaning of joy and happiness rather than those who try to weigh your down. Make sure that nothing stands in your way of happiness.
Focus on what’s inside you rather than going after external outlets for happiness
Instead of chasing external kinds of stuff for happiness, which again relates your emotions to materialistic things, try to look inside of you, into your core. Try to find out what makes you happy from within.
Take up meditation; look within you for joy and pleasure. Before anyone or anything can influence your emotions, try to look for peace in making yourself happy. This will ensure that you live every moment to the fullest, and nothing affects your inner peace and solace.
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Set realistic goals and expectations
One of the major points that everyone must keep in mind to be happy is to never set the bar too high. Once you do that, you create expectations that are almost impossible to be fulfilled, and this, in turn, brings sorrow and pain.
Try to make happiness an emotion that is easy to grasp. Smile at the littlest of things in life. Set smaller goals that will guarantee you happiness and joy, even though in little amounts.
Give happiness to others around you
Instead of chasing happiness and running behind it aimlessly, try to give happiness to others around you. When you offer joy to others, you will feel that it is so much more rewarding than running behind happiness for yourself.
When you see smiles on the faces of others you love, it will brighten up your entire day and also warm their hearts. It will lift your spirits as well in the process. So, show some love to your loved ones, or maybe compliment a stranger.
Pamper yourself rather than running behind happiness
Instead of chasing happiness, waiting for it to arrive all of a sudden, go all out and pamper yourself. Take a day off or even a week off and go for a vacation, or go to your favorite restaurant, try buying gifts for yourself which will make you happy.
When you do things that have always brought you joy, the happiness you get out of them is always fruitful. It goes down to your bones and brings you inner satisfaction.
Alter your focus and point of view
When you are scrambling to keep up with something you assumed would bring you happiness, try changing the course and look from a different perspective.
Rather than chasing random fits of happiness, which are never fruitful in the end, try to focus on things that you know will bring you happiness. If something doesn’t work, try a different approach, but don’t crib over what didn’t happen. This will bring you a lot less heartache and sadness.
Look at others from their perspective
When you chase happiness, you look for it everywhere and in everyone. This is when if someone lets you down or hurts you, you get engrossed in sadness.
To overcome this and prevent the behavior of others from making you sad, try to look at things from their perspective. Maybe they have a lot going on in their lives and are stressed out due to some reason. When you try to understand why they behaved that way, you prevent their behavior from influencing your happiness.
Maybe you are looking in the wrong place
Maybe you can’t achieve happiness because you are looking in the wrong place or direction. Stop looking at somewhere where there is no happiness or positive emotions for you to take in. Instead, look after something which can grant you happiness and lessen your heartaches and melancholy.
Start by identifying what makes you happy and how you can do that to achieve happiness rather than looking at the wrong place, which is just wasting your valuable time and energy.
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Learn to forgive others
Once again, when you chase happiness, you tend to look for it everywhere and in everyone, and when someone hurts you, you break down and let that sadness affect your whole mood. Instead of that, try forgiving them for what they have done and move on.
When you forgive others, you don’t carry that heavy burden in your heart, and no person, or thing, can influence your mood again and break you down. So, chasing happiness is of no use, as proved once again.
Chasing happiness often leads to unhappiness
When you are constantly running after happiness, as if it is something to be achieved, you can stress yourself out, which, in turn, will discourage you. It will wear you out both mentally and physically and affect your overall mood.
Instead of chasing after something futile, stop, take a break and decide what you should be chasing after, and set considerable goals which will, for sure, grant you happiness when you accomplish them.
You appear desperate when you chase happiness this badly
Ask yourself first, do you want to look dependent or desperate for something you are chasing? No, right? When you chase happiness and try to find it everywhere you go, you appear desperate in front of others.
This, in turn, makes it difficult for others around you to approach you. This thing can even lead to your downfall. Try to pause for a few minutes and have a look around you; you will find what truly makes you happy.
Figure out what makes you unhappy
To better understand what gives you happiness, you should first identify what are the things that make you unhappy. It is very important because it enables you to understand what matters. Take out some time to figure out what are these things making you sad.
When you do so, you filter out all the unnecessary things and clean the air for more positivity to come in. Learn to pave the way for newer and more positive things, which can grant you happiness.
Happiness isn’t running away from you, yet you are chasing it
Happiness is not creeping out of your grasp. It is right there in front of you. You just have to know where to look at and how to go about the things which can make you happier in the long run.
It is a natural process that can occur anytime and doesn’t require you to chase after it. Take a deep breath in and relax. Even though happiness is fluid, it is like a gentle stream, not a turbulent river.
Learn to live in the present moment
Stop chasing what is to come or what might come. Stop cribbing about what has happened in the past. Learn to live in the present moment and make the most of every second that passes by.
Learn to enjoy every ounce of your day and be grateful for whatever you have gone through and learned today. Every moment can be a learning curve for you. Go outside, enjoy the sunshine or the cool breeze that is blowing but don’t suffer by thinking what could happen next.
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Inculcate gratitude in your daily life
Gratitude is a very powerful tool that allows you to make the most out of every situation, doesn’t matter whether it is good or bad, and take in the positives from every circumstance.
When you are grateful even to the people who have done wrong with you or to the situations which have broken you down, you can easily scrape out all the positives and move on happily in life without having to chase happiness.
From the above points, it can be concluded that happiness is not a substance or an object which you should chase after; rather, it is a naturally occurring emotion that can take place at any given time in your life. Happiness can be found when you embrace the little things in life and be content with what you already have.
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“Mindfulness, meditation, and positivity – these three words describe me the best. I founded “BeHappyHuman” blog dedicated to spreading happiness and inner peace through mindfulness and meditation techniques. As a self-taught practitioner, I have been exploring these practices for the past decade and my passion lies in sharing their benefits with others. My mission is to help individuals achieve greater happiness.